Week 8 - Choosing my PhD in Social Transformation

The Choice Journey to PhD in Social Transformation at Tangaza University College was by far not straight.

Challenge 1: Area of study

I could perceive the gap. The interactions with the every day person and the 7 years of field data, it was crystal clear to me the disconnect between every day finance and livelihoods and policy / public rhetoric. But I lacked the skill set for deeper reflection on the why as well as how to articulate it in a coherent actionable way.

It was clear to me I needed to step away from my domicile in "heavy pre-formulated math" in Actuarial and Finance. Math was good at giving outputs from inputs but devoid of agency or reason - the why that explains the everyday human action.

Math will tell me the water is boiling (because of applying heat) but will be blind or ignorant to why we are boiling water in the first place (for a cup of tea?)

My mind was made up - a sociology prism is what I would major in.

Challenge 2: Where to study - the mindset

Obviously you go for the best. One way to judge the best is University Rankings - right? And the best ranking are the mainstay of the western world Universities. While I have nothing per se against their quality, I gradually became aware that this was a very insular metric to determining best.

By and large rankings are based on knowledge output - the academic journals, books and research prolificacy. That's the value promised - a supervisor well read and plugged in to the world of research and influencing policy. In this strength lies the weakness. The scholars are often "plugged in to their world" and "their reality". So for my masters to align to the body of knowledge at the Manchester Business School, I priced electricity commodity in the stock market - this exists in "their world" not "my world".

Obviously there is value in being different and tapping into the "other world" which is evident with great scholars from west leading in matters of the global south. But the more I read their works the more I could perceive the gap when a story is written from the "outside - in": the scholar jets into the country for a few months collects data and then jets out to synthesize and write. Inevitably, it is hard to immerse in the ontology of it all. The output is peppered with elements of biases and assumptions of "what is the expected" that often come from the body of older literature that had an even stronger disconnect to the ground.

With a bit of searching I was narrowed in on Spanish and Danish Universities that were quite liberal in accepting different ways of thinking - essentially you were "freer" to pursue your topic and were more forgiving of whatever background you had - more focused with problem you present and your ability and enthusiasm in solving it academically.

Challenge 2: Where to study - logistics

I was excited that I had narrowed my search down to a region and the University of Amsterdam. I would benefit from the wealth of knowledge but free to chart my way with guidance of a supervisor tolerant of different thinking. Then the elephant in the room came - can you pay for it. The annual price tag € 12,925 (Kshs. 1.7m) is a pretty penny. Though scholarships were available but few, they did often require full time engagement away from family for nearly 2 years. There was also the challenge that if I opted to be near my family and go with them my cost of living significantly increases even with the benefit of a scholarship.

To be honest I was very averse to taking on any more schooling with any form of debt (I had paid for my masters for a decade and the cost - benefit was south - money wise). I also had to bring a bit of me to play. Was I willing to cut off from family and my ground level study area at this point in my life. Nope. This was a life project for me - beyond a career opportunity - It was my becoming. They all needed to blend.

How do I balance remaining locally grounded, great rankings and price? South Africa came to mind. My search settled on two universities - University of Witwatersrand (Witz) and Human economy programme at the University of Pretoria. Unfortunately, the Pretoria program lacked the funds to take on PhD candidates. For Witz the preliminary advice was to seek admission in the PhD development studies but thereafter the verdict was negative - on probing, they felt that with my non-sociology background, they were comfortable only if I took a 2 year masters program then took on PhD. I received the regret on 9 June 2020. Something about hitting walls gets you to pause and step back.

Challenge 3: Back to basics

I sat down in deep reflection. I went back to basics. What did I want out of this?

1st (50%)- To be locally grounded with excellent academic support to articulate and solve for my real world.

2nd (25%)- To be debt free - pursue education sustainably putting no strain on my family. My pursuit of education should not be a cause of strain to the well being of me and my family.

3rd (25%)- To keep my family together

A conversation I had heard in June 2019 with a past colleague suddenly came to mind.

I called her up. There was a local university - low ratings and young (recognized a constituent university college on 3rd November 1992). They had a flagship PhD program - PhD in social transformation (in the institute of social transformation started in 1994 - the year of Rwanda genocide pivoting its desire to embolden Africans for African regeneration).

Being young and ambitious it has increasingly attracted top Kenyan scholars from South Africa and beyond (The very same ones I was pursuing in my applications). Their pastoral cycle methodology could initially turn you off in name but all it essentially says is you cannot graduate with a theoretical PhD or an "outside - in disconnected" PhD. You have to be immersed in the problem, flesh it from the human experience with their words then you can put your head. That spoke to my spirit.

The other tick boxes were checked. I am able to fully finance the PhD with my savings (I unlocked 50% of my pension savings) and I am able to be home to nurture my girls.

12 weeks into my PhD program, my mindset is opened to the prism of how ideas are shaped and propagated. I am interacting with colleagues from across East, Central and Southern Africa and am always encouraged to think "freely", "see and theorize my world as it is" and "accept that human person as complete as they are". I can say without a shadow of a doubt - I made the right choice.